Author Archives: sillybea

I’m crying uncle. How the fuck did this happen to me? For those of you feeling the same way, there is no answer apparently. Put one foot in front of the other and deal with it. Oh and a big fuck you to family members who don’t help. Fuck them. May they rot in hell

I’m at a loss. I feel like an orphan. Crazy parent, fighting siblings. How does one navigate all the dysfunction? Parent losing their mind, siblings squabbling. Is it the moon? Is it mental? I’m making space for me, desperate to not let all the insanity bog me down, but I’m drowning. Praying for peace. PrayingContinue reading “Family”

When someone doesn’t answer a phone call or text, you have your answer. They don’t give a rats ass about answering. So, you my friend, have your answer. Let them go. Say goodbye. Ciao!

You know those smash rooms? The ones you can smash shit? Yeah. I need one of those right now. It’s finals week and I’m doing my best to not have a total fucking meltdown. But you know what’s worse? Having “friends” who don’t give one iota rats ass about you or your life. I’m guessingContinue reading “I want to SCREAM!!!”

I’m doing a new therapy (for me) called EMDR. It’s fantastic! It’s removing my need for toxic everything- friends, relationship, family, coworkers – everything! I’m standing up for myself! Now if only it will help me kick the self sabotage…here’s hoping!

Ain’t no such thing. Trying to carve out a life below the Mason/Dixon line hasn’t been…easy. I’ve never had a problem making friends wherever I’ve lived. But something about the South – what is it? The people I’ve met here over the past few years have been somewhat friendly, but with the exception of twoContinue reading “Southern Hospitality?”

When I was married, my now ex-husband, whenever I had diarrhea of the mouth, meaning I let everything just stroll out of my mouth, would say to me, “think, then speak.” While I completely resented him for bringing this fault, albeit innocent, to light, I took it to heart. That was, oh, maybe 20 someContinue reading “Foot in mouth”

Worked on a TV series. Yay me! Had an amazing time. Worked my ass off. Great gig! But… the Lead actor wasn’t very….nice? Cordial? Giving? What gives? Why? Doesn’t he know or remember what it’s like to be someone who is dying (ok not literally) to work full time as an actor? Be kind. That’sContinue reading “Be Nice!”

Therapy, for those that need it, is an amazing outlet to process your shit. And by shit I mean just being a human being in this thing called life. After bucking it for many years because I was forced to go as a child and teenager, I embraced it in my mid 20’s. Besides friends,Continue reading “Therapy”

My life has become a series of group text messages, spam calls, and my fav, the “what’s for dinner?” question. I rarely hear from anyone unless I make the call. The only people who call me are spammers, and I finally had a meltdown and told my husband he has to cook two times aContinue reading “What Covid Has Done”